Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
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