whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize
