yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
