Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize