Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
