I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I wish you could order shots online.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
