It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I want her autograph on my taint
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
