I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
