:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
She's the barista slut.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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