She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
