k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Randomize
