took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Randomize
