I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize