okay pat passed out under dana's car
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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