Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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