chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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