The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Randomize
