I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
