I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Randomize
