White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
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