I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize
