I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
