doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
how does that bad decision feel?
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
