We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
