We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
