Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize