He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Randomize
