so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
