i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
