im gay
i know
yea but for you.
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Randomize
