she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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