coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
The police scanner is talking about you again....
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
I forget how to act sober
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