yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize
