After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
