i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Why is your signature on my underwear?
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Randomize
