U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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