It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
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