Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
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