She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
