Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
