Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize