found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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