i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Randomize
