i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
