Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
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