the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
