I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
