She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize