Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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