Quick, to the slutcave!
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
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